The iPhone is doomed, and it always has been

Every single version of the iPhone to ever be released has been doomed. In fact, some of them were so doomed I’m surprised we even acknowledge their existence anymore. Apple needs to just give up before the company has to start selling coffee mugs from its headquarters just to turn a profit.

Wait, Apple already does that? My god, it’s happening.

But don’t take my word for it, let’s look at all of the extremely well-thought-out arguments as to why each new iPhone was going to flop… until it didn’t.

iPhone – 2007

  • It doesn’t do 3G – What is this, the dark ages?
  • It’s locked to AT&T – Wow, Apple, way to kill your not-even-good smartphone idea before it even got a chance.
  • The camera sucks – No flash? Almost zero options? What a joke.
  • No picture messaging – My brother needs to see this burrito I’m going to eat.
  • No removable battery – Has Apple learned nothing from criticisms of the iPod?
  • No physical keyboard – Smartphones are supposed to have physical keyboards, that’s just a fact of life.

iPhone 3G – 2008

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